tonight we're having..

Graze Marmite Crunch

ok so graze is an actual word and i'm not just crazy. okay

it took a bit of debate what should be the second review of the month. after all the grass jelly was a bit of a banger, maybe not in terms of taste but in terms of how interesting it was to try out (and, subusequently, to review). i had made a few runs through various stores in preparation for this to build a varied repertoire so i had a modest selection of things to try out. and yet, nothing was calling out to me. nothing felt quite special enough

i was eventually persuaded into reviewing the marmite graze

couple years ago when i was living with tom (a marmite aficionado) we had a movie night where we tried to taste as many marmite related products as we can. we tried to marmitemaxx, if you will. a fool's errand at first glance, but ended on quite the positive note. turns out marmite flavored snacks aren't as foul as marmite itself can be, some quite enjoyable too! my favorite snack were the oven baked marmite cashews, which, trust me, are actually really good. so i was kind of excited to try some again but, unfortunately, the morrison's i went to was out. it was between the graze and peanuts. given that i didn't even know what graze was really i figured it was my duty to find out here

Are you a Marmite lover or hater? Our taste experts have joined forces with the legends at Marmite to create something super intense, crunchy and satisfying using their tastebud-tingling, all-star ingredient.
taken from graze's website

ok, this is a good starting point. let's go through this bit by bit

Are you a Marmite lover or hater? doesn't matter, tastes like nothing. Our taste experts highly doubt that. to create something super intense wrong. crunchy alright yeah, they're crunchy. and satisfying wrong. using their tastebud-tingling, all-star ingredient you mean marmite? i mean sure, i guess there is marmite in there

i dunno. i didn't like them. there wasn't anything to like really. as per my notes: they smell really just like faint marmite, which is kinda what youd expect right? and a little cardboard. but they don't taste like anything, just stale. sure, there's a faint memory of marmite in there but not that much. definitely less than i would've liked. it got me calling out for more marmite if you can imagine

it's only saving grace is more or less just the crunch. it's just that, crunchy with an aftertaste of marmite. i tried some with the peas from my dinner, they're good at adding crunch, but again, just that

i realise now i never actually described what it is, it's fried corn and fried broad beans. i suppose they're alright to have something to snack on while watching something if you particularly like fried corn snacks like this, sure, go ahead, but i'd honestly rather just have popcorn. not even CLOSE to being the best thing since sliced potatoes, as if something can even reach those heights

final rating - [▒▓█-----------------] : 3/20

boo

bauble has always been such a magical sounding word to me, this is basically what it felt like scratching this square off today